3 sides to every story

 Perspective is a funny thing.  I could write about everything that has happened over the last year and you still wouldn't know the real story.  Me writing about it, only tells my side.  I’m also aware that I could easily edit my side to make people see what I want them to see.  I have no doubt that I could make Sam look a horrible person.

But the thing is, Sam isn't a horrible person.  Sam is a good person.  I've spent the last 25 years assuming he knew that he was a good person and assuming he knew how much I love and appreciate him.  Now I look back and wonder what would make me think that he knew that.  I certainly never told him.

I always saw Sam as a rock.  Unbreakable.  

Rocks break.

The last year has been hard for me.  But I know that it has been even harder for Sam.  I still have most of my foundation.  My family.  My religious beliefs.  Sam has lost it all.  Three years ago, he lost him mom who just so happened to be the person that he loved and respected the most in the world.  He didn't love his job, but it was a job where he was important and respected.  Because of "rona" he had to fire all of the guys that had spent the last 10 years relying on him to provide work for them, and shortly after, lost his own job.  Then he discovered things about the church that he hadn't known.  He felt lied to and manipulated.  Basically, in just a few short years, EVERYTHING that gave him meaning and purpose in his life was gone.  I can't imagine what that feels like.

Another hard thing that Sam had to come to terms with, was the realization that when he finally decided to be honest about his changing beleifs, he would lose his family and friends.  That wasn't an irrational fear.  He HAS lost many of his friends.  Mormons don't like to associate with people that leave the church.  It makes us uncomfortable.

A couple months ago Sam was in a good mood.  He seemed like his old self and I asked him about it.

His answer:  Well.  When you spend a year being certain you’d lose ALL your family and friends when you finally told the truth, and then you didn’t, you’d be happy too.

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